God was missing for six days. Eventually, Michael, the archangel, found him, resting on the seventh day.

He inquired, "Where have you been?"

Subject: The Recession

The recession has hit everybody really hard...

My neighbor got a pre-declined credit card in the mail.

BLONDE COOKBOOK
Monday
It's fun to cook for Tom. Today I made angel food cake The recipe said beat 12 eggs separately.
The neighbors were nice enough to loan me some extra bowls.

Tuesday

The state legislature in California is considering a bill that would allow electronic advertisements on license plates.

Sarah Palin surprised a lot of people by recently calling marijuana "a minimal problem in America." She also admitted that she herself has tried pot.

President Obama gave a big speech last week about the oil spill.

President Obama gave a big speech last week about the oil spill.

Here is a little something someone sent me that is indisputable mathematical logic.

Chairman H
This is a strictly mathematical viewpoint...it goes like this:

A blonde goes to her local pet store in search of an 'exotic' pet. As she looks about the store, she notices a box FULL of live frogs.

The sign says: "SEX FROGS" Only $20 each!

Comes with 'complete' instructions.

An Israeli archaeologist has found the oldest known Hebrew inscription on a 3,000 year old piece of pottery.
The inscription says, "So how come you never call on your mother any more?"

It says it's struggling to meet demand for its new 2010 Chevrolet Camaro.

GM said, "We're sorry, but both of you are going to have to wait a little longer."

A Cincinnati firefighter was arrested after he was found drunk wearing a woman's blond wig and bikini in a public park.

knows how to make love a million different ways, but doesn't know any women!

FOOTBALL AND THE BLONDE......

Out of all the blonde jokes, this one has to be the best!

Football FINALLY makes sense..........

Women are like apples on trees. The best ones are at the top of the tree. Most men don't want to reach for the good ones because they are afraid of falling and getting hurt.

John McCain watched the recent vice presidential debate between Sarah Palin and Joe Biden. He loved Sarah Palin's performance!

Summer Classes for Men

NOTE: DUE TO THE COMPLEXITY AND DIFFICULTY LEVEL
OF THEIR CONTENTS, CLASS SIZES WILL BE LIMITED TO 8 PARTICIPANTS MAXIMUM

Class 1

A married couple in their early 60s was celebrating their 35th wedding anniversary in a quiet, romantic little restaurant.

Suddenly, a tiny yet beautiful fairy appeared at their table saying,

A man and his wife are fast asleep at 3 in the morning when the doorbell rings. Annoyed and grumbling, the man makes his way to the front door, expecting to rip somebody a new one.

The family wheeled Grandma out on the lawn, in her wheelchair, where the activities for her 100th birthday were taking place.

A fellow bought a new Mercedes and was out on the interstate for a nice evening drive. The top was down, the breeze was blowing through what was left of his hair and he decided to open her up.

Q: Where can men over the age of 60 find younger, sexy women who are interested in them?

A: Try a bookstore... under fiction.

Q: What can a man do while his wife is going through menopause?

A blonde goes into a coffee shop ...

A man walks into a bar and asks the bartender, "If I show you a really good trick, will you give me a free drink?" The bartender considers it, then agrees.

Q: Why was Helen Keller such a bad driver?

A: Because she was a woman!

What is the difference between a light on and a hard on?

You can go to sleep with a light on!

Why don't Mexicans have barbeques?

Once upon a time the government had a vast scrap yard in the middle of a desert.

|What do you call a Virgin on a waterbed? A CHERRY FLOAT!!!!

A Mexican fireman's wife gives birth to twin boys, whay did he call them?

Hose A & Hose B