|Internet Addiction Disorder (IAD)As the incidence and prevalence of Internet Addiction Disorder (IAD) has been increasing exponentially, a support group.

|An office technician got a call from a user. The user told the tech that her computer was not working.

|1. Thou shalt run lint frequently and study its pronouncements with care, for verily its perception and judgement oft exceed thine. 2.

The First E-mail Of Paul To The Romans by John CarneyFrom: paul0426@tarsus.com (Paul, A Servant Of Jesus Christ)To: allusers@rome.orgCC: s_peter@jol.com (Judaea

|he staff would sell you ornaments, but not know anything about them or what they were for. Or you could buy parts to build your own tree.

Computer Ease! The following are new Windows messages that are under consideration for the planned Windows 2000: 1. Smash forehead on keyboard to continue. 2.

|1. Log on, wait a sec, then get a frightened look on your face and scream "Oh my God! They've found me!" and bolt.2.

If Cray made toasters...They would cost $16 million but would be faster thanany other single-slice toaster in the world, at leastfor a couple of years.

|Picard "Mr. LaForge, have you had any success with your attempts at finding a weakness in the Borg? And Mr. Data, have you been able to access their command pathways?"Geordi "Yes, Captain.

THANK YOUThank you to all my friends who sent me such important emails this year!It's so wonderful that you included me in your quest to inform!Because of all of you I stopped drinking Coca-Cola after

|10. It doesn't take minutes to build the picture when you change TV channels.9. When was the last time you tuned in to "Melrose Place" and got a "Error 404" message? 8.

1. Log on, wait a sec, then get a frightened look on your face and scream "Oh my God! They've found me!" and bolt. 2.

|SEVEN SOFTWARE COMPANIES ADDED TO "WATCH LIST"New York, NJ, Nov.

|A person turned on the computer without a keyboard plugged in.When she turns on the computer, the computer finds out that there is no keyboard attached and it gives a "Keyboard Error" message.She the

|ADA: A Dumb ArrangementADA: A Dumb AcronymADA: A Dumb AnnoyanceBASIC: Boring And Shamelessly Idiotic CodersBASIC: Badly Assembled, Severely Illogical CodeBASIC: Beginner's Algorithms for Seemingly In

The PC Manifesto V3.0 Featuring a PC Primer and Revised PC Lexicon by Saul Jerushalmy & Ren

|They would immediately change the name to WatMas.

THE LIFE OF A COMPUTER ANALYST (Long but VERY Funny!) Monday ------ 8:05am User called to say they forgot password. Told them to use password retrieval utility called FDISK.

|You kiss your girlfriend's home page.A VRML virtual walk through a park is your idea of a good date.Your bookmark takes 15 minutes to scroll from top to bottom.Your eyeglasses have a web site burned

If Wang made toasters...Marketing would never agree upon what customers really wantor need in a toaster so millions of dollars would be spentin development and the toaster would be several years late.

|10. New seats would require everyone to have the same body size.9. We'd all have to switch to Microsoft Gas.8. The U.S. government would get subsidies from an automaker--a first.7.

Finally, a worthy pyramid scheme!

You know how they use to give immigrants a test when they came to America? Well the last question on the test was to use pink, green and yellow in a sentence.

| Software Engineer, a Hardware Engineer and a Branch Manager were on their way to a meeting. They were driving down a steep mountain road when suddenly the brakes on their car failed.

The Technologically Challenged Just in case you think YOU are TC (technologically challenged), there'sstill hope:1.

|The Information Highway BluesMy baby's got my 486. My cellular phone's on the blink. My fax's gone off to fax heaven, And Pay For View stinks.

|While trying to diagnose a problem over the phone I told the user to type out his autoexec.bat file.He said it said "File not found".I told him to do a dir.I asked him if he saw autoexec.bat listed.H

|They would want one big Santa, dressed in blue, where kids queue up for their present-processing. Receiving presents would take about 24-36 hours of mainframe processing time.

Befuddled PC Users Flood Help Lines, and no Question Seems to be Too Basic From the Wall Street Journal, Tuesday, March 1, 1994.

|AAC Alter All CommandsAAD Alter All DataAAO Add And OverflowAAR Alter At RandomAB Add BackwardsABC AlphaBetize CodeABR Add Beyond RangeACC Advance CPU ClockACDC Allow Controller to Delete ContentsACD