The family wheeled Grandma out on the lawn, in her wheelchair, where the activities for her 100th birthday were taking place.

Q: Where can men over the age of 60 find younger, sexy women who are interested in them?

A: Try a bookstore... under fiction.

Q: What can a man do while his wife is going through menopause?

A senior citizen in Florida bought a brand new Corvette convertible. He took off down the road, flooring it to 80 mph and enjoying the wind blowing through what little hair he had left on his head.

|There's quite an art to falling apart as the years go by,And life doesn't begin at 40.

An elderly woman entered a large furniture store and was greeted by a much younger salesman.

|A retiring farmer in preparation for selling his land, needed to rid his farm of animals. So he went to every house in his town. To the houses where the man is the boss, he gave a horse.

Two senior couples are walking along, wives in front, husbands inback. Herb says to Sam, "Gee, we went to a new restaurant last nightand had the best meal ever.

|OLD POSTAL CARRIERS never die, they just lose their zipOLD PRINTERS never die, they're just not the typeOLD PROGRAMMERS never die, they just byte itOLD PROGRAMMERS never die, they just decompileOLD P

An old lady lived by herself in a small house in a small town.

An elderly man tells the Doctor he is planning on marrying a women of 30, and would he have any suggestions."Yes," says the Doctor, "I would advise you to take in a boarder."A year later at his 80th y

|An old man visits his doctor and after thorough examination the doctor tells him: "I have good news and bad news, what would you like to hear first?"Patient: "Well, give me the bad news first."Doctor

|Thought I'd let my doctor check me,'Cause I didn't feel quite right. .

An old man goes to the doctor and says "Dr., I don't know what's wrongwith me. My dick is orange."The Dr. tells him to pull down his pants and let him take a look.

|An elderly widow and widower were dating for about five years. The man finally decided to ask her to marry. She immediately said "yes".

An old man is sitting on the park bench crying.

|OLD RADIOS never die, they just stop receivingOLD RAILROADERS never die, they just derailOLD RAIN PUDDLES never die, they just dry upOLD SAILORS never die, they just get a little "DINGHY"OLD SAILORS

One evening a family brings their frail, elderly mother toa nursing home and leaves her, hoping she will be well caredfor.

Nancy & Betty, and Jim & Tom were in the old people's home. Nancy & Betty thought Jim & Tom weren't getting enough excitement so they decided to run naked past Jim & Tom's room.

|Three retirees, each with a hearing loss, were taking a walk one fine March day.One remarked to the other, "Windy, ain't it?""No," the second man replied, "It's Thursday."And the third man chimed in,

I am a senior citizen...
- I'm the life of the party... even when it lasts 'till 8pm.
- I'm very good at opening childproof caps with a hammer.

"Look at me." an elderly Yuppie boasted to his guests at his birthday bash.

|Two elderly couples were enjoying friendly conversation when one of the men asked the other, "Fred, how was the memory clinic you went to last month?" "Outstanding," Fred replied.

An old man and an old lady are gettingready for bed one night when all of asudden the woman bursts out of thebathroom, flings open her robe and yells:"Super Pussy!"The old man says: "I'll have the sou

|OLD SOCCER PLAYERS never die, they just achieve their final goalOLD SOCCER PLAYERS never die, they just lose their kickOLD SOLDIERS never die, they just fade awayOLD SOLDIERS never die, they just sme

Partial DosageAn elderly gentleman went to the local drug store and asked thepharmacist for Viagra. The pharmacist said "That's no problem.

Seems this elderly couple went to the clinic and asked to be tested for HIV.

|For the first time in many years, a an old man traveled from his rural town to the city to attend a movie.

|Two elderly women were out driving in a large car-both could barely see over the dashboard. As they were cruising along they came to an intersection.

A couple of geezers were sitting on a bench outside the nursing home, havinga little chat. "How are you, Tom?" asked Marvin."I'm not feeling well today - utterly exhausted," Tom replied.

|A small town prosecuting attorney called his first witness to the stand in a trial--a grandmotherly, elderly woman. He approached her and asked, "Mrs.