Q. What do you call a Marine with an IQ of 160?A. Platoon

|An Israeli soldier who just enlisted asked the Commanding Officer for a 3-day pass. The CO says "Are you crazy? You just join the Israeli army, and you already want a 3-day pass?

|The 1982 Israeli invasion of Lebanon resulted in many dogfights between Syrian and Israeli jet fighters.In the end, the Syrians lost over 80 planes and had a number of SAM batteries knocked out, whil

|China blames U.S. for second mid-air collision!Beijing (Reuters) - Chinese officials have stated they are holding the United States,?

|A ranger outfit was having training in mountain climbing.

The Army Airborne major was used to harassment from AirForce fliers about crazy Army paratroopers jumping out of perfectly good aircraft.

Q. Why did congress enact the Marine Corps?A. So, the sailors would have someone to dance with!

|The General went out to find that none of his G.I.s were there. One finally ran up, panting heavily. "Sorry, sir! I can explain, you see I had a date and it ran a little late.

|The 1982 Israeli invasion of Lebanon resulted in many dogfights between Syrian and Israeli jet fighters.In the end, the Syrians lost over 80 planes and had a number of SAM batteries knocked out, whil

|1. Sickness: No excuses will be acceptable.

|An Army recruiter delivered a windy pep talk to encourage a group of college students to join the VOLAR.

During training exercises, the lieutenant driving down a muddyback road encountered another car stuck in the mud with a red faced colonel at the wheel.

The general went to the doctor for a physical.

|This is the transcript of an actual radio conversation of a US naval ship with Canadian authorities off the coast of Newfoundland in October, 1995.Radio conversation released by the Chief of Naval Op

|The following are supposedly true headlines that have appeared in papers during the war.Some Leading Papers' Coverage of Custer's MassacreVariety: "Custer Closes Out of Town"Pravda: "Big Red Victory.

|DURING a readiness exercise, my friend Jim and I, Air Force security policemen, were guarding entry to a bunker-like structure where aircrafts were kept.When a pilot about to do a preflight check app

|The following is supposedly a true story relating to an actual sailor's experience in the Army.After turning in from a four to eight watch the seaman overslept and missed muster.

Young Amanpreet never quite got over his miserable childhood as an orphan in the ghetto.

During the Six Day War, this division of Arabs is making its way across the burning desert sands towards Israel, when the Arab commander, bouncing along in his jeep, spots an aged Israeli on top a dis

|The chief of staff of the US Air Force decided that he would personally intervene in the recruiting crisis affecting all of our armed services.

|An F-111 was flying escort with a B-52 and generally making a nuisance of himself by flying rolls around the lumbering old bomber.The message for the B-52 crew was, "Anything you can do, I can do bet

|Time sensitive note: This joke pertains to the crash of a Chinese plane into a United States plane over International waters.

|The physical training instructor was drilling a platoon of soldiers."I want every man to lie on his back, put his legs in the air and move them as though he were riding a bicycle," he explained.

The Master Chief was inspecting the barracks and heoverheard one terrified recruit whisper, "Master Chief Barneshas the heart of a tiny child . . . on his desk . . .

A company in the Foreign Legion had spent three years in the Sahara desert never having seen a woman.

|Two men were boasting to each other about their old army days."Why, my outfit was so well drilled," declared one, "that when they presented arms all you could hear was slap, slap, click.""Very good,"

|One reason the Services have trouble operating jointly is that they don't speak the same language.

|An Army brat was boasting about his father to a Navy brat."My dad is an engineer. He can do everything.

A young, freshly minted lieutenant was sent to Bosnia as part of the peace keeping mission. During a briefing on land mines, the captain asked for questions.

|These are actual phrases from Officer Efficiency Reports (performance appraisal for the military officers).