John and Mary were having dinner in a very fine restaurant.

|What do gay guys call hemroids?
Speedbumps

A man and his wife are weeding the garden one day when his wife bends over to pick some more weeds.

The Big Horse Race Horses in the race are:1. Passionate Lady2. Bare Belly3. Silk Panties4. Conscience5. Jockey Shorts6. Clean Sheets7. Thighs8. Big Johnson9. Heavy Bosum10.

There's an elderly man and woman sitting in the sunroom of a retirement home. The old man says to the woman, "For five dollars, I'll have sex with you on that rocking chair over there.

Did you hear about the hooker that had herappendix taken out?Now she does business on the side!

A Guide to Love and Sex for VirginsAs a young, modern virgin of the nineties, you no doubt have manyquestions concerning romance, love, even s..e..x.

Did you know Sex is a crime?Its a misdemeanor - The more I miss de meaner I get..

Did you hear about the woman who only had two chances to get pregnant? -She blew them both...

Biology Class In a biology class, the professor was discussing the high glucose levels found in semen.

Why do women fake orgasms?Because men fake foreplay.

A guy was sitting in a bar when a strangerwalked up to him and asked, "If you woke upin the woods and scratched your buttand felt vasoline, would you tell anyone?""Hell no!" the guy said.The stranger

One evening after attending a concert, two men were walking down the road when they saw a well-dressed and attractive looking woman walking ahead of them.

How does a women hold her liquor?By the ears.

Have you heard about the new orgasm pill just approved by the FDA for women?It comes with a 16 inch applicator

HOW TO SATISFY A WOMANCaress, praise, pamper, relish, savor, massage, empathize, serenade, compliment, support, feed, tantalize, humor, stimulate, stroke, console, hug, coddle, excite, pacify, protect

Why is sex like money in the bank?Because when you withdraw, you lose interest.Sent by Annette

What's 3 feet tall and gives me head?My son.

This redneck gets married, but on his wedding night he doesn't know whatto do. He's fumbling around for a while, but finally his wife gets fed upand says, "Jeb, ya big idiot!

Man to a woman: Do you know the difference between a blowjob and a cheeseburger is?Woman: NoMan: Lets have lunch sometime...Sent by jim

A 70-year-old man has never been married. One day he meets a beautiful 17-year-old girl, and it is love at first sight. They get married and go to Florida for their honeymoon.

Three little old ladies, sitting on a park bench.The town flasher comes by and shows them his ALL!The first little old lady had a huge stroke. Thesecond little old lady had a little stroke.

How is sex like air?It's no big thing unless you aren't getting any.

Q: What's the worst thing about being a paedophile?A: Having to go to bed so early!

Two hookers were on a street corner.

A blind guy goes into a whore house.

One afternoon this young girl knocked on the door of her neighbor,to chit chat the afternoon away. She walked in and said my god youlook so depressed.

One day a priest went into a public bathroom to use the stall. While he was on the toilet, he heard moaning coming from the stall next to him.

Two pedophiles were sitting on the beach.One said to the other "Hey get out of my son!"

Recipe for Banana Bread Ingredients: 2 Laughing Eyes 2 Loving Arms 2 Well Shaped Legs 2 Firm Milk Containers 1 Fur Lined Mixing Bowl 2 La