A blonde goes to her local pet store in search of an 'exotic' pet. As she looks about the store, she notices a box FULL of live frogs.

The sign says: "SEX FROGS" Only $20 each!

Comes with 'complete' instructions.

Q: What do you call a sick German Shepherd?

A: A Germy-Shepherd!

How to Catch a White Elephant ============================= Submitted By Niels Kristian JensenGo to an place where there are white elephants.

"I think Rover is getting a bit old, he seems to be going deaf.""Bullshit, watch this...Rover sit! Oh dear, you're right, I'll getthe shovel and clean it up!"

Three mice are sitting in a bar talking about how tough they are. The first mouse slams down a shot and says, "I play with mouse traps for fun.

This was originally posted in rec.sport.pro-wrestlingDate: 1999/03/04Author: briang68g@gearthlink.netI like monkeys. The pet store was selling them for five cents a piece.

"What's the difference between the North American porcupine and the African porcupine," the society matron asked the zookeeper."The principal difference is the North American species has a longer pric

If I have a rooster and you have a donkey and your donkey bitesoff my roosters feet, what do you have? Two feet of my cock in your ass.

A man goes into a bar with his dog. He goes up to the bar and asks for a drink.

A woman and her friend are visiting the zoo.They are standing in front of the big silverback gorillas cage, when one woman makes agesture that the gorilla interprets as aninvitation.

These 2 hunters was hunting one day and this one hunter fainted. The other hunter didn't know what to do, so he called 911. When the person answered the hunter told them that his partner was dead.

There's a guy with a Doberman Pinscher and a guywith a Chihuahua.

How do you catch an elephant?First you dig a big hole, and fill it with wood and ash. Then you take aloadof peas and line them up around the hole.

|Two vampire bats wake up in the middle of the night, thirsty for blood. One says, "Let's fly out of the cave and get some blood.""We're new here," says the second one.

|Having detailed the concept of attitude control, there is another method which you may prefer.

There was once a wide mouth frog. She had babies and she didn't know what to feed them.

|INSTRUCTIONS FOR GIVING YOUR CAT A PILL 1. Pick cat up and cradle it in the crook of your left arm as if holding a baby.

For all animal lovers out there:How do you make a cat go 'woof'? Soak it in petrol, and set it on fire. and...How do you make a dog go 'miaow'?

What do you call a dog with two balls and no hind legs?Sparky

What does the snail say when he gets on the turtle?"Wheeeeeeeeeeeee!"

The UN sponsored a competition on which nation can produce the best bookon elephants.The British submited a dry historical account "The Elephant and the British Empire."The French submited a text "

A woman went to a podiatrist complaining that her feet always hurt.He immediately noticed that she was extremely bowlegged."Have you always been that way?" asked the podiatrist."No," she said, not unt

A blind man is standing at the corner with his seeing eye dog waiting to cross the street, when his pooch lifts his leg and pisses down the side of his nice herringbone tweed trousers.

A little turtle begins to climb a tree slowly.

You know why a dog licks his ass?Because he knows in five minutes he'll be licking your face.

What did one Lesbian Frog say to the other? Gee, we really do taste like chicken.

Why did the raccoon cross the road? He didn't, he got hit by a car.

A highly timid little man, ventured into a biker barin the Bronx and clearing his throat asked, "Um, err,which of you gentlemen owns the Doberman tied outsideto the parking meter?"A giant of a man, we

How To Give Your Cat a Pill 1. Grasp cat firmly in your arms. Cradle its head on your elbows, just as if you were giving a baby a bottle.

An old lady owned two monkeys. One day they both died,so she took them to the taxodermist."So you want them mounted?" asked the taxidermist.To which she replied: "No. Holding hands will do just fine."