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JokeClicks

Creative wording

|BEING CREATIVE WITH TROUBLESOME KIN You are working on your family genealogy and for sake of example, let's say that your great-great uncle, Remus Starr, a fellow lacking in character, was hanged for horse stealing and train robbery in Montana in 1889. A cousin has supplied you with the only known photograph of Remus, showing him standing on the gallows. On the back of the picture are the words: "Remus Starr: Horse thief, sent to Montana Territorial Prison, 1885. Escaped 1887, robbed the Montana Flyer six times. Caught by Pinkerton detectives, convicted and hanged, 1889." Pretty grim situation, right? But let's revise things a bit. We simply crop the picture, scan in an enlarged image and edit it with image processing software so that all that is seen is a head shot. Next, we rewrite the text: "Remus Starr was a famous cowboy in the Montana Territory. His business empire grew to include acquisition of valuable equestrian assets and intimate dealings with the Montana railroad. Beginning in 1885, he devoted several years of his life to service at a government facility, finally taking leave to resume his dealings with the railroad. In 1887, he was a key player in a vital investigation run by the renowned Pinkerton Detective Agency. In 1889, Remus passed away during an important civic function held in his honor when the platform upon which he was standing collapsed."

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Joke of the Day

Centipede

One day the big animals and the little animals decided to have a football game. As the first half went along, the big animals were scoring at will. Every time they got the ball they would run it in for a touchdown.Then came the second half...First play: The elephant runs the ball up the middle. WAP!! Tackled for a five yard loss.The little animals go back to the huddle cheering and congratulating each other."Who made that tackle?" asked the ant."I did," said the centipede.Second play: The rhinoceros runs the ball up the middle. WHOMP!! Tackled for another five yard loss.Back in the huddle the flea asked, "Who made that great stop?" "I did," said the centipede.Third play: The gorilla tries an end sweep, led by the hippo throwing the lead blocks. SMACK!! Centipede tackles him for a ten yard loss.Back in the huddle, the gnat asked the centipede, "Where were you in the first half?"The centipede replied, "Puttin' on my shoes!"

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