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JokeClicks

Man in pub

A man walks into a pub with a neck brace around his neck. He asks for a pint. The bartender gives him one. Then the man asks, "Who's in the lounge?" The bartender replies. "15 people playing darts." The man says, "Get them a pint too."Then he asks, "Who's upstairs?" The bartender replies, "150 people at the disco."The man says, "Get them a drink too." The bartender says, "That will be $328 please."The man says, "Sorry but I haven't got that much money on me."The bartender says, "If you were at the pub a mile from here, they would of broke your neck."The man says, "I've all ready been there."

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Joke of the Day

Centipede

One day the big animals and the little animals decided to have a football game. As the first half went along, the big animals were scoring at will. Every time they got the ball they would run it in for a touchdown.Then came the second half...First play: The elephant runs the ball up the middle. WAP!! Tackled for a five yard loss.The little animals go back to the huddle cheering and congratulating each other."Who made that tackle?" asked the ant."I did," said the centipede.Second play: The rhinoceros runs the ball up the middle. WHOMP!! Tackled for another five yard loss.Back in the huddle the flea asked, "Who made that great stop?" "I did," said the centipede.Third play: The gorilla tries an end sweep, led by the hippo throwing the lead blocks. SMACK!! Centipede tackles him for a ten yard loss.Back in the huddle, the gnat asked the centipede, "Where were you in the first half?"The centipede replied, "Puttin' on my shoes!"

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