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JokeClicks

Office Inspirational Posters

Top 20 Sayings We'd Like To See On Those Office Inspirational Posters:1. Rome did not create a great empire by having meetings, they did it by killing all those who opposed them.2. If you can stay calm, while all around you is chaos...then you probably haven't completely understood the seriousness of the situation.3. Doing a job RIGHT the first time gets the job done. Doing the job WRONG fourteen times gives you job security.4. Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines.5. Artificial Intelligence is no match for Natural Stupidity.6. A person who smiles in the face of adversity probably has a scapegoat.7. Plagiarism saves time.8. If at first you don't succeed, try management.9. Never put off until tomorrow what you can avoid altogether.10. TEAMWORK...means never having to take all the blame yourself.11. The beatings will continue until morale improves.12. Never underestimate the power of very stupid people in large groups.13. We waste time so you don't have to.14. Hang in there, retirement is only thirty years away!15. Go the extra mile. It makes your boss look like an incompetent slacker.16. A snooze button is a poor substitute for no alarm clock at all.17. When the going gets tough, the tough take a coffee break.18. INDECISION is the key to FLEXIBILITY.19. Succeed in spite of management.20. Aim Low, Reach Your Goals, Avoid Disappointment.

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Joke of the Day

Stupid Funny Quotes

"Things are more like they are now than they have ever been." --President Gerald Ford "My fellow astronauts..."--Vice-President Dan Quayle, beginning a speech at an Apollo 11 anniversary celebration. "Capital punishment is our society's recognition of the sanctity of human life."--Orrin Hatch, Senator from Utah, explaining his support of the death penalty. "China is a big country, inhabited by many Chinese."--Charles de Gaulle, ex-French President "I stand by all the misstatements."--Dan Quayle, defending himself against criticism for making verbal gaffes "Gerald Ford was a Communist"--Ronald Reagan in a speech. He later indicated he meant to say 'Congressman'. "Outside of the killings, Washington D.C. has one of the lowest crime rates in the country."--Mayor Marion Barry, Washington D.C. "We found the term 'killing' too broad."--State Department spokesperson on why the word 'killing' was replaced with 'unlawful or arbitrary deprivation of life' in its human rights reports for 1984-5 "This is a great day for France!"--President Richard Nixon while attending Charles De Gaulle's funeral "This is the worst disaster in California since I was elected."--California Governor Pat Brown, discussing a local flood "It's not listed in the Bible, but my spiritual gift, my specific calling from God, is to be a television talkshow host."--James Baker, televangelist. "The chairs in the cabin are for the ladies. Gentlemen are not to make use of them till the ladies are seated."--Instructions posted in a river cruise ship, Suir River, Ireland. "The exports include thumbscrews and cattle prods, just routine items for the police."--U.S. Commerce Department spokesman on a regulation allowing the export of various products abroad. "What he does on his own time is up to him."--Harlon Copeland, Sheriff of Bexar County, Texas, when one of his deputies was caught exposing himself to a child. "Facts are stupid things."--Ronald Reagan, misquoting John Adams in a speech to the Republican convention.

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