A blonde goes to her local pet store in search of an 'exotic' pet. As she looks about the store, she notices a box FULL of live frogs.

The sign says: "SEX FROGS" Only $20 each!

Comes with 'complete' instructions.

Q: What do you call a sick German Shepherd?

A: A Germy-Shepherd!

A travelling salesman stopped alongside a field on a country road to rest a few minutes.The man had just closed his eyes when a horse came to the fence and beganto boast about his past.

A woman was thinking about finding a pet to help keep hercompany at home.She decided she would like to find a beautiful parrot; itwouldn't be as much work as say a dog, and it would be funto hear it s

A vampire bat came flapping in from the night covered in fresh blood and parked himself on the roof of the cave to get some sleep.

Why do elephants have 4 feet? -Because 4 inches isn't enough.

A woman reporter is driving a jeep in the desert. She sees a Captain in the French Foreign Legion pulling and tugging on a camel, but the camel won't budge.The woman stops and says, "Captain!

The manager of a large city zoo was drafting a letter to order a pair of animals.

What does Tarzan say when he sees a herd of elephants in the distance?"Look, a herd of elephants in the distance"What does Tarzan say when he sees a herd of elephants with sunglassesin the distance?No

Q. How many flies does it take to screw in a lightbulb?A. Two. But I have no idea how they get in there.

A dog walks into a butcher shop with a purse strapped around hisneck.

A man running a little behind schedule arrives at a picture theatre, goes in to watch the movie that has already started, and as his eyes adjust to the darkness, he is surprised to see a dog sitting b

Did you hear about Adolph, the brown-nosed reindeer? He could run as fast as Rudolph, he just couldn't stop as fast.

|While waiting for a bus, the blind man's dog decided to go to the bathroom all over the blind man's legs.A passerby commented to the blind man, "What!

What do you do when a Rottweiler gets amorous on your leg?Fake an orgasm.

Q: Why do dogs bury bones in the ground?
A: Because you can't bury them in trees!

Q: Why did the poor dog chase his own tail?
A: He was trying to make both ends meet!

What do you call a woodpecker without a beak?A headbanger

What is the last thing to go through the mindof a mosquito when it hits your windscreen?It's ass.

|After many years of marriage, a husband has turned into a couch potato, became completely inattentive to his wife and sat guzzling beer and watching TV all day.

|I went to the cinema the other day and in the front row was an old man and with him was his dog. It was a sad funny kind of film, you know the type.

One day the zoo-keeper noticed that "Cheech" the orang-utang was reading two books -- the Bible and Darwin's Origin of Species.In surprise he asked the ape, "Why are you reading both those books"?"Wel

A duck walks into a general store and asks the manager,"Gotany fresh fruit?""No.""Got any fresh vegetables?""No.

Everybody I know who has a dog usually calls him "Rover" or "Spot". I call mine Sex. Now, Sex has been very embarrassing to me.

Two men were walking along the street when they cameupon a dog licking his dick.One man said, "I sure wish I could do that." The other replied, "You can, but you're probably goingto have to pet him fi

A new lieutenent in the French Foreign Legion arrives at an isolated base in Algeria.

Did you know elephants have sex organs on their feet?

They step on you and you're screwed.

Sent by D.L.Chapin

What is the difference between en elephant and a plum?An elephant is grey.What does Jane say when she sees a herd of elephants in the distance?"Look!

A vacationing penguin is driving through Arizona when he noticesthat the oil-pressure light is on. He gets out to look and sees oil dripping out of the motor.

Three dogs are sitting in the waiting room of a vets office.

What came first, the chicken or the egg? - I'd have to say it was the rooster!