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JokeClicks

The best book on elephants

The UN sponsored a competition on which nation can produce the best bookon elephants.The British submited a dry historical account "The Elephant and the British Empire."The French submited a text "The Sensuality of the Elephant -- a Personal Account."The Germans submited 47 Volumes entitled "An Elementary Introduction to the Foundation of the Science of the Elephant's Ear."The Americans submited an article from "Money" magazine: "Elephants -- the Perfect Tax Shelter for the 80s"Green-Peace submited a counter-entry "Elephants -- they're better than People"The Russians submited a terse manuscript titled "The superiority of the Soviet Elephant"And submited a poem "The Joy and Freedom Brought forth by the Soviet Elephant."But the Japanese won with their Promotional Flier "We have no Elephants but wouldn't you want to buy a Honda instead"

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Bad News 6

This old man visits his doctor and after a thorough examination, the doctor tells him, "I have good news and bad news, what would you like to hear first?"Patient: Well, give me the bad news first. Doctor: You have cancer, I estimate that you have about two years left.Patient: OH NO! That's awful! In two years, my life will be over! What kind of good news could you probably tell me, after this???Doctor: You also have Alzheimer's... In three months you'll forget everything I told you.

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